When I was a little boy I asked a foreign entity to come into my heart and take over my body. He told me I was lost and hopeless without him, and that he would take my life if I didn’t obey his every word. I was very afraid. My entire community told me I needed this spirit in order to survive and live a good life. I could not trust my own heart because something was wrong with me: I was wicked and rebellious. This spirit constantly policed my thoughts and harassed me for every desire and sexual fantasy that wasn’t the way he wanted it to be. He told me I was his spiritual slave, that I had been bought with a price and my body and spirit were no longer my own. I was dead to myself, and I no longer lived. It was all about being a channel for god’s spirit, bypassing my agency and my heart. I was to constantly empty myself of all personal desires and surrender to his plan for my life. I wasn’t allowed to have my own plan. I was required to surrender my critical thinking and decision-making and trust him blindly–he called this faith. He told me any other spirit or way of life was evil and deserving of punishment. After many years, I realized that I no longer felt like myself. I had given over everything to this spirit, and in the process, I lost my identity. I felt like my soul was empty. I couldn’t tell what was me and what was Jesus. I had sold my soul.
I had my own personal exorcism of the Jesus of fundamentalism. I decided to take my life back. I got rid of the crosses and symbols that represented my spiritual slavery and broken identity. I renounced his lies that he had any rights to my body. I confessed my sin of wronging myself, of not honoring my heart and dreams, of destroying my sexuality. I told this version of Jesus, “I cast you out in the name of myself, my highest good, and the good of all beings. You have no place in this heart any longer. From now on, I am free.” I felt a tremendous rush of relief. I began to see life in brighter colors, and instead of constantly looking outside of myself and denying my heart’s desires, I have learned to make my own decisions and trust my internal guidance system. I am a free spirit, not to be dominated by any spirit outside of myself. If I choose to work with another spirit, it will be a partnership, not a master-slave relationship. I am so much happier, and everybody sees it; except for those who are also in slavery and can only see the will of Jesus. They can’t see my progress and joy because their spirit wants me back as his slave, so they tell me. That will never happen again. I wish they could share my joy, but I know that they need to have their own experiences of disillusion before they can rejoice with me.
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Do you feel psychologically traumatized by religion, or isolated and disempowered by trauma and limiting beliefs in your life? I’m Andrew Jasko, Master of Divinity (M.Div.), M.A., Counseling Psychology in progress, and I work to help you transform your trauma into the place of your power and connect to a healthy, authentic spirituality that works for you (whether that’s as a spiritual, atheist, religious, transitioning, or agnostic identifying person). I was born into a minister’s family and became a preacher and missionary to India, after studying theology at Wheaton College and Princeton Seminary. As a Christian, my relationship with God was my passion, but unhealthy religious teachings caused me an anxiety disorder, sexual repression, and spiritual disillusionment. I felt alone, traumatized, and abandoned by the divine. After an agonizing crisis of faith, I rejected religion and spirituality. Then, I had an unexpected spiritual awakening through mystical and spiritual practices like meditation, psychedelics, and connecting my heart’s desires and intuition through my Divine Mindfulness practice. My passion is to help you in your spiritual or life transition to heal and connect with your authentic spiritual wholeness.
BOOK ME TO SPEAK: andrew@lifeafterdogma.org about healing religious trauma and psychology, spirituality and mental health, interpreting the Bible through a mystical, nondual lens, psychedelics, and other topics. I also provide consultations for therapists and ministers and speak on podcasts and video channels.
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This is powerful. Thank you for sharing.
This is powerful. I couldn’t be happier for you, Andrew. Thank you for sharing.
I heard your story and I’m not going to say I’m praying for you because that would just be me making you upset knowingly… but I am just curious to how after years of being a follower of Christ you can just “quit”. I know someone who was once your friend and they told me you wanted to be a missionary? I really am not trying to upset you I am just incredibly curious. My name is Angela and acantu@students.fccschool.com is my email.
Hi Angela. Thanks for asking. I’m glad you see that saying I’m praying for you implies condescension and a stance of judgment, rather than curiosity and openness to real learning and listening. You can find my story on this site, and by reading through my posts. No one “just quits” religion. Many things have to happen, usually a realization of how the religion was oppressive and abusive.
I agree that there is no real “quiting”. It is more like ones journey taking a different path. For me it started with personal crisis and certain questions just not being answered in a convincing way (disingenuous).
For me it took leaving religion to find the divine and experience personal transformation.
Ok, um wow. I am living in Christ my friend and what you kind of sound like a victim of demons, they played you like a fiddle. These entities messed with your mind forcing you to cast out a loving God. God by no means forces you to do anything he has given us all free will because if we were to blindly follow and worship him, it wouldn’t be true undying love, and for you to hate the fact that God tries to keep you away from sexual immoralities shows just how much he wants to keep you on the right path, trust me bro. I wish he was like that to me. But he wouldve blessed you tremendously if you stuck by him. I’m sorry you just couldn’t trust him enough. But I had to say my peace In this
I would say you’ve dealt with one of the versions of Jesus. A version handed down to you from others who never really grew enough to truly grasp what real relationship with God is like.
I fully agree that any union with God has to be a partnership and that’s what Jesus seeks: “I have called you friends”.
Since I came to know him outside of a church I managed to establish my relationship before others and their less-than-2000-years-old doctrines started seeping in… the very ‘false teachers’ that Jesus warned about but who they think are always ‘not them’.
I’ve come to realise that such a relationship is really achievable without any input from other believers or within any organisation. Though I’m glad to have real brothers and sisters in my life who share this journey with me, imperfect and different though we all are.
Shalom.
Religion is only a primitive machination by Man to command, suppress and exploit others, to which only life forms that are weak in their consciousness succumb. When Man indulges in his religions, i.e. malevolent, erroneous doctrines, his consciousness wastes away more and more and ultimately leads to a bottomless abyss.
Jesus Yahshua Y’hoshua 666 ANTILOGOS Christ is the messager of Hell on Earth. Jesus Y’hoshua Christ is truly the Child of Evil, the child of ruin, Jesus Christ is the deadly opponent against knowledge, wisdom and truth, and the opponent against love, peace, respect and harmony. It is the Anti-Logos in manifold form. It is the force of evil, the 666, which is against the truth of Creation, against the truth of the Spirit and against the obedience to the laws and Recommendations of CREATION.
The true 666, 666-Antilgos actually represents the Anti-logos, Jesus Christ is the true Antilogos-666, Jesus Christ and religion and politics are the Un-reason, which leads to all forms of evil. Jesus Satan Christ is the Child of Evil, the Child of Destruction, who is a Deadly Enemy of Knowledge, Wisdom, and Truth, an enemy of Love, Peace, Reverence, and Harmony. It is the Antilogos, in a myriad of forms. Jesus Christ is the real ANTILOGOS-666.
CHRISTOISM IS:
The delirant and irrational, illogical and stupid belief that some invisible cosmic Jewish Zombie can make you live forever if you, symbolically, like a Canibal, eat his invisible flesh and, telepathically, tell him that you accept him as your Magic Invisible Master, so he can remove an Evil Force from your soul that is present in the humanity because a Rib-woman was convinced by a Magical Talking Snake, a relativa of the talking ass, to eat from a Magical Tree.
Makes perfect sense.
⚠️⚠️⚠️ RELIGION IS POISON. TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT THE ANTILOGOS 666 XESUS TRUE AND REAL FACE HERE. NICE SLIDE SHOW:
SPREAD IT IN ALL SOCIAL MEDIA.
See the TRUE evil face of Jesus Satan Christ here:
https://archive.org/details/TrueFaceOfJesusChristIsSatanAntilogos666
The principles of the Islamismus, the principles of the deranged and demented insane and deadly DELIRIOUS shitty Christoism, Evil and insane Christoism Bullshit of all denominations and muilticolours, and the irrational Jewish Hebraism are, indeed, and truly these ones, as follows: Cynicism, Bigotry, Insanity, Imbecility, Idiocy, the Feud, the Wars, Warmongery, Lies, Bestiality, Murder, Slavery, religious and absurd fairy tales, the Hatred of the fellowman, Slavery of the Conscience, Total Espiritual Poverty, the Misery, the Curse, the Death, and the Ruin of the whole humanity and the whole planet Earth, the most Complete Ignorance and belief in invisible delusional and nonexistent beings. The biblical ‘handed down’ data and DELUSIONAL fairy tale stories are in truth based on legends, deliberate LIES and falsifications, and on a deceitfully produced chronicle that is incorrectly arranged and wildly imagined.
Religion is only a primitive machination by Man to command, suppress and exploit others, to which only life forms that are weak in their consciousness succumb. When Man indulges in his religions, i.e. malevolent, erroneous doctrines, his consciousness wastes away more and more and ultimately leads to a bottomless abyss.
There is a fundamental difference between religion, which is based on authority, and Science, which is based on observation, Reason, and Logic. Science will win because it works.
Science is the greatest and best human endeavor. This, yes, can save us while jesus shitty head christ and your Dog God are as real as the legend of the Tooth Fairy, The Bogeyman, Peter-Pan, Santa Claus, the Werewolf, or the fanciful and delirious fantasies of a crazy mind.
Do you want to keep waiting for them? Then that is Your problem! Your invented and delusional non existent gods will never ever come!
Information about biblical “traditions” is truly based on legends, lies, and conscious counterfeits, as well as all of them are fanciful chronicles invented and false, deceptively elaborated.
The Bible is a complete FORGERY a SHITTY DIRTY farce and a Hoax. On top of this farce and deceitful hoax are founded the Churches, the stupid cults, the sects, the imbecilic religions, their doctrines, their fake and deceiving teachings and still the blind and enslaved deists who follow the lies and absurdities of the bible the book of lies.
It’s very powerful to hear things phrased this way…and starkly contrasting to the imagery of what led me to God…as an always loving “father”, or as my “bridegroom”…desiring relationship and loving me eternally.
The thing is…those best attributes I ascribed to God were actually me telling myself that past mistakes are OK, and I can be free to live unencumbered by limitations.
It’s chilling to realize how much fear I hold about taking such a similar path of renouncement.
I think a prison metaphor is most apt…I don’t know how to live outside of the prison I’ve lived in my whole life. How to feel about the world now that I see my jailer was myself…allowing superstitions of ignorant, bigoted family and leaders hijack my entire life of freedom.
I’ve just begun working with Andrew, and I’m already inspired. I feel less alone, more hopeful, and tentatively excited for the healing/grieving process.
There is no way out of demonic, “god-form”, possession, not because it is impossible to expel a demon, but because the possessed person is too afraid to try or they do not want to be free of it. The bonds are loose enough to shed. It is not what is said that matters, it is what is done that matters. Without the ability to act, all knowledge is impotent and all words are useless. God is what nothing else can be, because God does what nothing else can do. Without this definition of God, how would you know the “thing” you worship is truly God or just some entity that is much smarter than you, and very clever at pretending to be God? It is safe to say that the act of complicating that which is simple is almost always the hallmark of a deceiver, attempting to obtain something it could not otherwise get. The most obvious way to do this is to mirror back the information provided, but in reverse. A move that works in life and chess when people aren’t paying attention.